"For some reason, this 30 minute shepherds pie took 40 minutes to prepare. At first I was confused, but then I realized I must have finally mastered the ability to warp the space-time continuum. Was/is/will be delish. See you last week! "

"I have never enjoyed pineapple, prior to trying this recipe. Furthermore, while making this delightful dish, I had an epiphany. Perhaps the reason I don't enjoy bananas is due to my method of preparing them, as well? While I eagerly await a "Sliced Bananas" recipe, I have to warn you, this can get messy. Do not attempt to prepare "Pineapple Wedges" on the couch during the commercial breaks while watching your afternoon soaps, as I did. Also, when Ken found out Marsha's baby was really Dr. Jones's and not his father's after all, it upset me so much that the tears blurred my vision and I ended up in the ER, getting 14 stitches. Also, the carpet is ruined. Other than that, great!

"As a veteran of the U.S. Armed Services, I found I could not enjoy "English Peas". It felt unpatriotic. I wish you would post a recipe for "American Peas" instead. My neighbor tells me that I can modify this recipe by adding the other 1/2 stick of butter and get "American Peas" that way, but she lets her rottweiler poop in my yard I KNOW IT'S YOU, EVELYN and then denies it, so I can't really trust her. A little feedback here?

"You should really consider telling people this recipe contains sugar! My daughter is diabetic, so I always make sure to check each recipe for sugar before I prepare it for her. Well guess what? It turns out that "Dark Chocolate as a Snack" is FULL of sugar. And it gets worse, because when the ambulance arrived at the emergency room, the doctors there called CPS on me for giving it to her in the first place! It's great that I have my afternoons free again (CPS put her in a foster home) but who is going to pay these all medical and legal fees? FOR GOD'S SAKE THINK OF THE CHILDREN

"I will say this "Late Night Bacon" is tasty, but the portion is too large for one person. I could only finish half the paper towels (they really are filling), so I gave the rest to the cat. He seemed to enjoy them, but the next day all hell broke loose with his bowels. Do you have any idea how much emergency cat surgery costs, Rachel? It also broke the bond of trust between us (which I had carefully nurtured for YEARS!) and he keeps biting me whenever I get near him with food now. You'll be hearing from my attorney.